It doesn’t seem like it should be legal to sell cyanide as a foodstuff, but here we are.
Whatever you do, don’t eat a bowl’s worth.
I hear plenty of griping about the new chip credit cards in the United States. They may be marginally slower than the old swipe cards, but the real problem at present is the uncertainty when it comes to determining how you should use your card. This temporary card that Panera is inserting into all of their credit card readers is both great design that addresses a real problem and a sad indication of just how poorly the transition is going:
[Photo courtesy of P. Kafasis]
However, for the fourth time in the past two years, my credit card number has been compromised. If chip cards reduce the frequency with which I need to update my card in a dozen different places online, so much the better.
Anyhow, I recently received yet another new credit card after the most recent account breach. In years past, this would have meant a phone call to a real person who would then take the oppurtunity to pitch one or more other paid services from the credit card company. More recently, cards at least offered a secondary web address to activate the card online. My newest card included the following sticker:
I very much appreciate the emphasis on using the website. Nevertheless, I’m concerned by the secondary text. I have some copy-editing suggestions.
Are you one of those sickies who likes to use your phone as a phone? Please dial: 1-800-678-7820
Have you used up your smartphone’s data cap for the month? Please dial: 1-800-678-7820
Remember phone calls? Please dial: 1-800-678-7820
Are you just some sort of maladjusted weirdo? Please dial: 1-800-678-7820
We’re lonely. Please dial: 1-800-678-7820
The worst part of all of this is that because their website was temporarily down, I did have to call. Thankfully, I only had to deal with an automated assistant which worked well, and the whole thing was over in less than 60 seconds.
While taking a rare glance at Facebook on Sunday, I spotted this image:
What in the hell is this nonsense? Mother’s Day, I get. Let’s absolutely set aside a day to recognize our wonderful mothers (hi Mom!). Father’s Day is coming up, and that seems fair too. I can even get on-board with Grandparent’s Day. But is anyone forgetting about children? Is any group more catered to in our society than children? For that matter, is anyone going to see this and think “Well, I was gonna go shopping, then hit a few buckets at the driving range, but I guess I’ll take Susie to the park to fly a kite instead”?
Wikipedia has some background information, particularly as it relates to the US. While we may have a national Pan American Aviation Day and a National Forest Products week in this country, “a permanent annual single Children’s Day observation is not made at the national level” here. In fact, here’s the calendar for when Children’s Day is observed in America:
Dates for Children’s Day in the United States
2015: 2 August
2016: 12 June
2017: 30 June
2018: 26 June
2019: 11 June
As near as I can figure, “Children’s Day” is celebrated on the first of approximately whenever. Maybe June-ish.
But upon re-examination of the original image, it was the second line of text that really put me over the edge.
Let’s make today special for kids of all ages.
That’s just everybody! That is literally every person alive on the planet. You might as well just call this “Special Day”, or even just “Happy Day”. So I hope you did something great on Sunday, dear readers, because whoever you are, it was apparently your day.
Previously in holidays: After All, We’re All Somebody’s Father