Obviously, not everyone shares my opinion of KFC. Nowhere is that more obvious than in Gaza, where fried chicken smugglers take hours, and a massive percentage, to deliver the not-so-fast food to grateful customers.
Wednesday, May 15th, 2013
It’s been awhile, but it’s now once again time for Money Quotes from the news. Let’s watch!
In a story similar to one seen in the very first Money Quotes post, a cockpit distraction has again caused problems. OFT reader Ajay M. wrote in with the story of a possibly-pilotless Air India flight. Initial reports indicated that both the pilot and co-pilot had left their posts, but India’s Directorate General of Civil Aviation is claiming that the pilots and two flight attendants were instead locked in the cockpit for an extended period.
“What happened inside is best left to your imagination. We’re conducting an inquiry,” a source said.
I dunno — my imagination can get pret-ty sexy.
Next up is the story of Hugh Jackman’s crazy-ass stalker Katherine Thurston, who apparently came after him with an electric razor. Why?
“I hated him having those whiskers,” Thurston told police.
Apparently Thurston also spoke to Jackman’s wife at some point, telling her “I’m going to marry your husband”. Wow.
Meanwhile, a man named Justin Green recently attempted to surf a subway train. That’s certainly stupid, but it gets worse.
When confronted by an officer, Green said he had a “God-given right to do anything he wants”.
More people should avail themselves of their right to remain silent.
Finally, we have the tale of crazed driver Mercedes Austin, who apparently attempted to run over a girl for quote “shaking her butt”. Austin was so outraged that she drove directly at a police officer and two young women as they crossed the road. In addition to saying that she needed to teach that girl a lesson “because she was shaking her [butt] in the middle of the road”, Austin stated:
“I didn’t know that guy was a cop, I thought he was a security guard.”
Seriously, idiots, the Fifth Amendment is there for you.
Monday, May 13th, 2013
Tom Cruise is perhaps most famous for his role as Ron Kovic in “The Making of ’Born on the Fourth of July’”. Throughout his 30 year career, however, Cruise has also played several Jacks. Let’s look!
A List of the Jacks of Tom Cruise:
Film: Legend [Link]
Trivia: The sound of the unicorns at play is actually a recording of humpback whales!
Note: Filmed with a (then-quite-large) $30 million dollar budget, “Legend” grossed only around $15 million, making it quite a flop. Cruise’s first true blockbuster “Top Gun” was released just one month later.
Film: Jack Reacher [Link]
Trivia: The character in the book series is described as being 6 feet 5 inches tall. Tom Cruise is 5 feet 7 inches tall.
Note: The rather-ridiculous character name purportedly originates from author Lee Child’s own lofty height. While struggling with the first book, Child and his wife were at the grocery store when an elderly woman kindly asked Mr. Child if he could reach a product on the top shelf for her. Child’s wife mused that if he couldn’t finish his book, he could always get a job as a professional reacher.1
Film: Oblivion [Link]
Trivia: Writer/Director Joseph Kosinski is not related to “The Office” star John Krasinski.
Note: With this film, Tom Cruise has actually played a Jack in two consecutive films.
Stay tuned for Cruise’s next Jack ____er role.
This completes our tour of the Jacks of Tom Cruise. I hope you have enjoyed this list. For a similar list, please see A Man for All Seasons, featuring Nicholas Cage.