How to Choose a Good PIN (Number)

Wednesday, March 3rd, 2010

A PIN (or, redundantly, PIN Number) is a Personal Identification Number. It’s a simple password most commonly used to withdraw cash from an ATM (or, again redundantly, ATM Machine). Many people don’t know how to choose a good, or even truly great, PIN. Fortunately, One Foot Tsunami is here to help.

Length

The first thing to consider when selecting a PIN is its length. Here, there’s always a trade-off between security and convenience. A PIN like 93725493629364012641274 is very secure, but not very convenient to enter. Conversely, a PIN like 7 is very convenient to enter, but not very secure. If you have a choice, you probably want a PIN that’s between 4 and 9 digits in length.

Memorable

Ok, so you need a number that’s around 6 digits long. That may seem simple enough, but what many people fail to realize is that their PIN must also be memorable. At first glance, a PIN such as 763829 might seem appropriate – it’s a perfect 6 digits long, after all. But how the heck are you going to remember that? You won’t, because it’s a pile of crap.

When selecting your PIN, you need to make sure it’s something you’ll remember under even extreme stress, because you need to pay that pimp like right now and he doesn’t care how much you had to drink before you spent time with his ho, he just wants his goddamned money immediately, you miserable son of a bitch.

Birthdays

So, how do you select a PIN of the right length which is also memorable? Birthdays are a good place to start, but your own birthday is much too obvious. Instead, how about the October 7th, 1955 birthday of violin legend Yo Yo Ma? That yields a dexterous PIN of 10755. German Chancellor Angela Merkel is also a good choice. As everyone knows, her birthday is July 17th, 1954, which gives us the strong, musky-smelling PIN 71754.

Musicians and erotic foreign leaders aren’t your only options, however. Your pet’s birthday can also be a good source for your PIN. Of course, you probably don’t know your pet’s exact birthday. If that’s the case, you’ll need to just make one up. To ensure you’ll remember both the date and your associated PIN, you’ll want to plan a lavish party for your Alistair Fuzzypaws or little Miss Whiskers. Be sure to handwrite the date on calligraphed invitations for all the neighborhood pets, to enhance recall!

Stylish PINs

Perhaps you’re hoping for something with a bit more style and flair. If so, you’re in luck. First, there are retro PINs, such as 12345. This is commonly known as the Spaceballs PIN, and it dates back to 1987 and the film of the same name.

Maybe you’re after something a bit more modern, a bit more twenty-first century. In this case, there are chic PINs for you. For something a bit trendier, allow me to suggest the very popular Bluetooth Pairing PIN, 0000.

Finally, for the swinging bachelor and the pubescent boy with his first ATM card alike, there are sexy PINs. These PINs will titillate, arose, and most assuredly never be forgotten. Perhaps the best of these is the grade-school classic 80085. Magnificent, isn’t it? Sadly, you won’t get to see its magnificence on the ATM screen, as it will be replaced with *****. But the machine will know. It will know, and it will appreciate your sensuality.

Conclusion

I hope this guide to the world of PIN (numbers) has helped you in your quest to select the perfect PIN. There are many styles to choose from, but the absolute most important thing when picking a PIN is that you believe in yourself. Selecting a good PIN is no different from performing open-heart surgery or sending a man to the moon. All it really requires is confidence.


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