I was born by the river, in a little tent, and just like the river I’ve been barfing ever since. Yes, this installment of Barvd is a long, long time coming. We went through all of 2013 without a proper edition of Barvd, which almost certainly explains that hole you feel in your very being. However, just because a collection wasn’t published doesn’t mean the nauseating tweets and more weren’t being collected. So, herein, a retrospective showing the most vile post of each month of 2013.
Was that an expression of dismissal, or just the catcaller’s second try?
Ah, horsemeat jokes. Mostly forgotten now, yes, but topical and nauseating back in February 2013. With the horsemeat scandal long past, the question is, what are you eating now?
It’s not actually possible to sew a person together from ballsacks, but rest assured, science is working on it.
Despite the grossness of a zombie nipple, it’s Mr. Simpson’s hopefulness that’s truly revolting.
No! No you cannot! Not in the morning, nor in the evening, nor at supper time.
This was referring to a Sesame Street-themed amusement park aimed at young kids, which you’d have to assume is already a super bacteria breeding ground. Kids nursing from slushie spigots, however, is beyond the pale.
A Tom Arnold would probably look pretty much the same coming back up as it did going down.
Apparently, no one triggered my gag reflex in the month of August, and that’s perhaps the most sickening thing of all. Let’s move on.
Krang! Just reading that, I let out an involuntary yelp.
Can the health department be called to close a kitchen in someone’s house?
This one is so bad, Neven actually prefaced it with a warning. I did not. Hey, you knew what you were getting in to.
There’s only thing fouler than drinking hot “special garlic dipping sauce”, and that’s eating Papa John’s in the first place.
That’s a Wrap
There you have it, “2013: The Year in Disgusting”. Who knows what the coming year holds in store for us? We shall see! If you’ve seen an awful tweet, Instagram pic or other post, send it in or just tweet a link to @PBones.