If you’ve been hoping for an in-depth look at the computers of Law & Order, well then friendo, you’ve got it. Jeff Thompson has painstakingly researched the rise of computers, as viewed through the lens of two decades of the TV show “Law & Order”.
Monday, February 17th, 2014
Recently, I received a tremendously useless email from travel booking site Hotwire.com, congratulating me on my “four year anniversary” with the service. Instead of including some sort of deal or other incentive to book more through them, the email had this map:
At a quick glance, the map is comprised of the names of American cities, placed approximately according to their geographic location:
Look a little closer, however, and you’ll see a whole mess of cities in the wrong place:
We’ve got Pittsburgh north of Boston, Memphis below San Jose, Detroit and Washington, D.C. on the Gulf Coast, and not one, not two, but three Austins, none of them in the right place.
The email included no information on this image. Best guess, they started with the biggest cities in the right place, then filled in the rest at random. I must say, however, this is not inspiring much confidence that my next Hotwire booking will be in the right place.
Wednesday, February 12th, 2014
As you’ve likely seen, NBC’s Olympics anchor Bob Costas is suffering from a nasty case of pinkeye. When the Games opened, we were treated to the sight of his infected left eye, in hilarious and awful fashion:
On Tuesday, Matt Lauer filled in for Costas, who’d been benched after the infection spread to both eyes. Lauer will be subbing in tonight as well, and had this to say:
“I had to go in early, not to practice my lines, but to Lysol your whole dressing room,” Lauer said about filling in on Tuesday.
[Costas] plans to make it up to Matt for filling in for him.
“In return for this, I promise to step in on the next 10 ‘Steals and Deals’ and ‘Ambush Makeovers,’” Costas joked.1
Personally, I feel Costas should have worn an eyepatch when the infection was contained to just one eye. Now, I’m not a medical doctor, but it seems like an eyepatch might have helped prevent the spread of the infection.2 If not, it still would have looked badass, even on Bob Costas. How often do you get a legitimate chance to wear an eyepatch on national television? Unless you’re Samuel L. Jackson playing Nick Fury, the answer is never!3
Yet Costas blew it, and we wound up with this horror show:
Bob Costas should not be allowed on television.
Frankly, it seems like there should be some way for technology to assist us here. Can’t they greenscreen his eyes with a pair of green contacts?4 Use some CGI? Something! I just can’t believe we can put a man on the moon, but we can’t shield the world from Bob Costas’s unsightly eyes.
Costas seems to believe one of Lauer’s garbage bits is worth 1/10th of a night of Olympics coverage. That exchange rate seems awfully generous to Laeur. Perhaps the infection is affecting Costas’s reasoning, as well as his appearance. ↩
Monday, February 10th, 2014
Recently, Barvd made a
triumphant disgusting return to these pages. One “winner”, @ems, asked what the icon would be for a Barvd. I hadn’t thought of it before, but emoji definitely seem like the way to go here. They’re widely available, and full of all manner of pictures. So I took the time scan through the emoji offered by iOS 7, and I’m pleased to present the Official Barvd Emoji:
The Official Barvd Emoji
This is technically called the “speak-no-evil monkey”, and it comes in a set with the see-no-evil and hear-no-evil monkeys: 🙈 🙉 🙊. However, on its own, this little simian definitely looks like it could be holding in some puke. Probably after reading a disgusting tweet someone posted.
So when someone says something disgusting, and you want to let them know, just send them a Barvd Monkey. They’ll get the message.