Results of an Email on My Condo Mailing List, Regarding Anonymous Dog Poop Left in a Public Space

  • Denial despite no direct accusation (“It wasn’t me“).

  • Assurance mixed with horror (“I would never do such a thing”).

  • Suggestion that this may in fact be goose poop, from local geese.

  • Guarantee, from the original poop-spotter, that he knows the difference between dog poop and goose poop, thank you very much.

  • Demands for community standards, signs, and fines for rule breakers.

  • A continuation of my own gradual disillusionment with the world and everyone in it.