Trust No One ∞

In a modern takeover, the criminal is let in AND the owner is locked out.

Friday, July 31st, 2026

As a pilot, Ryan Pettit understands that having a single point of failure in an aircraft would be a very bad thing. Through hard experience, he’s now preaching the perils of a single point of failure in digital systems as well.

No aircraft I have ever flown is permitted a single point of failure: every critical system carries a backup, and often a backup for the backup, so that no single fault can bring the plane down. Redundancy is the first principle of any system that cannot be allowed to fail. And yet millions of people carry their entire financial and personal identity on exactly one such lock, and think nothing of it.

This is a horrifying read, one that has me reassessing my own digital security.

D–, Vile Harassment, but Solid Financial Outcome ∞

Good for the Steiners.

Thursday, July 30th, 2026

Back in 2024, I wrote about the intimidation campaign eBay executives waged against David and Ina Steiner. The monstrous actions undertaken on behalf of eBay were unconscionable, and no one should go through what the Steiners went through. At the time, the company had to pay a $3 million fine, and at least one person was sentenced to jail time.

Two and a half years later, a civil settlement has been reached, and it seems to represent at least some measure of justice. The couple will receive just shy of $50 million, with most of it coming from eBay, but some being paid by former executives involved in this heinous crime. As well, according to the settlement press release, former eBay CEO Devin Wenig “will contribute an additional $1 million to a charity dedicated to protecting First Amendment rights in the name of Ina Steiner”. That’s a start.

A Missing Underscore ∞

“He should never have been charged, let alone convicted.”

Wednesday, July 29th, 2026

Now here’s a modern nightmare.

Police were looking for a man using the Kik messaging service under the name “fus__ro_dah” (two underscores after “fus”), but they accidentally requested records for the username “fus_ro_dah” (one underscore after “fus”).

As a result of that missing underscore, an innocent man who had absolutely nothing to do with the crime in question served 18 months in jail.

While I understand how the mistake led to this poor guy becoming a suspect, I really can’t fathom how he was convicted. What the hell happened during that trial?

Perhaps We Should Just Shut It All Down

It is correct and right to kink-shame this.

Tuesday, July 28th, 2026

Last week, Wired published an article with the headline “People Are Getting Off to Porn About ICE Raids”. I have not read this article. I do not intend to read this article. I’m not even going to include a link to this article. You can find it if you really want to, though I suggest you do not.

I have skimmed the article just enough to determine that the headline is a valid summary of its content, and of reality. And I suppose once I got over the shock of the headline, my next thought was “Of course they are”. But the very idea is so depraved it never would’ve entered my mind.

Last year, writing about people posing for pictures outside Florida’s horrifying Alligator Alcatraz, I said:

These images haunt me. The people in them are despicable. They are sick. They would pose with lynching victims, if only they could get the chance.

I am similarly haunted by the idea of someone being aroused by pornography themed around ICE’s dehumanizing raids. I remain ashamed to share a country with people capable of reveling in the misery of others. We can be better than this. We must be.

No Thants ∞

A jail term for this might be excessive, though.

Monday, July 27th, 2026

Today in ridiculous “What are you in for?” prison stories, the owner of a Michelin-starred restaurant in South Korea could face a year in jail for using ants as a garnish. Barvd.

In its defence the restaurant owner argued that just 60% of diners had opted to try the ants, while the rest were served alternatives like fermented vinegar and edible flowers.

“Only 60% of our customers consumed this illegal dish!” strikes me as not a great defense.

Mitch McConnell’s Legacy ∞

It’s a vile one.

Friday, July 24th, 2026

Mitch McConnell is, purportedly, still alive. Given that, the Louisville Courier Journal has pre-published a scathing obituary, while no one can complain “How dare you write that about a dead guy?”.

Just Another Manic Mortgage ∞

“Oops, I bought a very dumb house!”

Thursday, July 23rd, 2026

Last year, I linked to an article on a $5.5 million Cape Cod mansion that was on the verge of tumbling into the ocean. Not long after, the house was demolished to prevent that fate. While the house is no longer extant, owner John G. Bonomi Jr. apparently still owes millions on his mortgage. Now, he’s suing JPMorgan Chase in an effort to nullify that contract.

Mistakes were certainly made here, but Bonomi’s lawsuit seems unlikely to bail him out of his.

An Assortment of Bad Emails

The lawyers in particular have been busy.

Wednesday, July 22nd, 2026

I’ve recently received a higher than average number of dumb emails. Let’s talk about a few of them.

Subject Lines From Dumb Emails I’ve Recently Received

  • ***Attention requested, Paul: You’re getting the latest about these scams
    Oh boy, hot scam news! And yes, those asterisks were in the subject line.

  • Spring fun begins now, %%Informal Greeting%!
    Presumably, the mailing software for this message would’ve replaced the variable %%Informal Greeting%% with, I don’t know, “friend”, or “amigo”, or “buckaroo”. But whoops, they left off a % and the whole thing broke.

  • We’ve Updated Our Terms of Use
    I’m sure the lawyers think they’re best served by letting everyone know about fine print updates, but Shake Shack, I really, really do not care about your terms of use. I buy a better-than-you’d-expect Veggie Shack from you perhaps twice a year, and that’s the entirety of our relationship.

  • We’ve Updated Our Terms of Use
    Bonus, Shack Shake sent me the exact same message ten days later. I’m not sure if they felt it important to remind me about the change, or if they actually updated their terms of use twice in quick succession. You know, because I didn’t actually read the terms for buying a veggie burger.

  • Learn more about our updated Terms of Service
    I don’t want to, Google. I’m also not going to read about “Updates to Google Play Terms of Service” that you emailed about three days later.

  • Your credit score has changed-here’s how
    When I opened this email, I learned that my credit score had dipped by exactly one point. Capital One even included a graphic:

    They did not, however, include my actual score within the email. That might have been mildly helpful, though I’m confident that a change of one point is very much just noise.

  • Paul, you’re no longer enrolled in CreditWise from Capital One
    After receiving the previous email, I sought a way to turn off these pointless notifications. Capital One said “If you no longer want to receive these emails, unfortunately you’ll have to unenroll from CreditWise.” OK then.

You might think this points to a method of getting fewer dumb emails, by having fewer accounts overall. Alas, even that strategy seems imperfect. Back in February, I cancelled my Alliant credit card and closed my account entirely. Nevertheless, as I was writing this post, I received an email from them. The subject line? “Your July Alliant credit card statement is now available online”

3:42.66 ∞

Gosh, that’s fast.

Tuesday, July 21st, 2026

Back in March, Scottish runner Josh Kerr announced his intention to break the world record in the one mile, which had stood for more than a quarter-century. That record was set way back in 1999, in an entirely different millennium. It belonged to Hicham El Guerrouj, who ran an incredible 3:43.13.

On Saturday, Kerr made good on his promise. Donning a bespoke speed suit and custom running spikes, he ran a mile faster than anyone in history. Roger Bannister would be proud.

What Luck ∞

Only time will tell.

Monday, July 20th, 2026

Potential good news, everyone! It appears possible that when the sun exhausts its hydrogen fuel and expands into a red giant in about 5 billion years, Earth might not be swallowed up.

Using updated models of how aging stars interact with their planets, researchers found that the gravitational forces drawing Earth toward the expanding sun are weaker than older models predicted. That would give the planet more time to drift outward as the dying sun sheds its outer layers into space, potentially avoiding engulfment altogether.

There’s a lot of unknowns and uncertainty in the calculations, but, ya know, fingers crossed.

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