I Assume It Tasted Like Chicken 

Today, in bird news…

We all did dumb things as teenagers, but who steals and eats a swan?

Please Wear Clothes in Your Digital Driver’s License Photo 

Keep your pants on.

It’s a reasonable request which will undoubtedly not be met by everyone.

This Shouldn’t Need to Exist 

This just makes me sad.

In 2022, A.A. Milne’s original Winnie-the-Pooh entered the public domain. In 2023, the character (and his friends) are being used to teach children how to react in the event of a school shooting.

It’s nice that America’s public domain laws have been improved recently. Perhaps now we can work on our gun safety laws?

A Warning on Using ChatGPT in a Professional Capacity 

Maybe ChatGPT should require a license.

In the latest case of an untruthful artificial intelligence, ChatGPT made up imaginary legal cases which a lawyer then cited as precedent. Yikes.

Previously in lying large language models (LLLMs): ChatGPT Is Also a Liar

Take a Minute 

OK, it’s also the day many pools open, yes.

Here in America, it’s Memorial Day. Though often discussed as the unofficial “start of summer”, the purpose of this federal holiday is actually to honor U.S. military personnel who died while serving in the armed forces. Since 2000, we’ve apparently also had a National Moment of Remembrance.

I can’t say I was aware of this before now, but the Washington Post has the details, including this:

At 3 p.m. on Memorial Day, Major League Baseball games will pause, Amtrak train whistles will blare, and buglers and trumpeters will sound the solemn notes of taps.

If you hear an Amtrak train whistle blaring this afternoon, you’ll know why.

They’re Just Giving ’Em Away 

I don’t quite understand why they go to auction if no one takes them for free.

Would you like a free lighthouse? Head over to the terrible domain of disposal.gsa.gov, and one could be yours.

Boat Killer Whales 

Why not?

Let’s be honest, humanity has this coming.

Timers vs. Alarms

That is very much not what I want.

Today in stupid Siri bugs, let’s have a look at failed timers. When last I wrote about timers, it was to grouse that the iPhone is incapable of running two timers at once. The Apple Watch, however, is a precision timekeeping device. It’s more capable, and has mastered the science of running two (or more) timers at once. Wow!

Unfortunately, if Siri fails to hear the full command for a timer, things go rather wrong. Recently, I wanted to set a timer for three minutes. I said exactly that to my Apple Watch: “Set a timer for three minutes”. However, it seems Siri missed the last word. This was the result:

A two part message. Part 1: “Set a timer for
three”; Part 2: “Timers can't be set for a time of day, so I set your alarm for 3 AM.”

This is a truly terrible automatic behavior. Because it didn’t hear my full command, the system created an undesired alarm and defaulted it to on. If I’d failed to notice this error, I would both not have been alerted when three minutes had passed, and been woken up rudely in the middle of the night. That’s not great.

Rather than assuming I don’t understand the difference between timers and alarms, it would clearly be better for Siri to ask a clarifying question.

Locked by Loggins 

Stay out of the danger zone.

The next time you need to generate some secure passwords, consider getting yourself some Kenny Log-ins.

Man Frames Dog 

This poor dog can surely do better.

The police report for this whole mess is pretty brutal.

The man, whom police didn’t name, appeared intoxicated, and when asked by an officer if he’d been drinking, he ran away, the post said…He was apprehended about 20 yards from the vehicle, police said…The dog was handed over to a friend of the driver while he was in jail, the post said. “The dog does not face any charges and was let go with just a warning.”

That’s outrageous. A warning for what? Ain’t no rule says a dog can’t drive his drunk friend home.