Today in horrible emails, it’s an unsolicited come-on I recently received from Neodrop.ai (link intentionally omitted). Their message suggested their A.I. could write content for this very website. I have reproduced it in its entirety:

Hi there,

We recently came across One Foot Tsunami — humor writing, kept tight and funny.

That’s exactly the kind of humor-essay blog we built NeoDrop for — an AI content team that keeps creating for you. Tell it what to make — newsletters, videos, podcasts, or articles — and how often; it researches fresh sources, picks what matters, and produces editable content on schedule, so jokes get drafted before the news moves on.

Imagine a punchline-perfect morning, draft ready:
– Draft essays in your comic voice
– Turn headlines into topic lists
– Keep the laughs scheduled
You keep the final judgement, editing, and fact-checking.

If anything comes up while you’re using it — questions, feedback, or ideas — just reply to this email; we’d love to hear how it can work better for One Foot Tsunami.

Best,
NeoDrop Team

I have not used the advertised service, nor even looked at it. I did briefly consider using Neodrop to write an article mocking the idea of using Neodrop to write content for this site, but even that idea made me sad.

Still, I do have some simple feedback: I do not want this. No artist should want this. Stop. This is a bad solicitation, one whose very existence is depressing. It’s much worse than creepy Sid the payroll rep, who at least wanted to offer me a service that might be useful.

I write this site for fun. One Foot Tsunami is a hobby, a labor of love, and a creative outlet. I hope to use my writing to entertain, amuse, and educate real readers like you, and the key phrase there is my writing.

Using the robots to do it for me would be beyond pointless. It’s not quite as evocative, but just as Dan Brooks doesn’t want a robot that pets the dog for him, I don’t want the machines to write my damned blog for me.