Nobody Counts In L.A.

Tuesday, June 4th, 2013

On a recent trip through Los Angeles International Airport, I found myself confused as to my exact whereabouts. Having landed in the International terminal, and needing to get to Terminal 3, I discovered a peculiarity in the way Angelenos count.

Counting to 8, Everywhere but Los Angeles:

1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.

Counting to 8, in Los Angeles:

1, 2, 3, Tom Bradley, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8.

LAX Airport Map
I dunno exactly how much it is, but Tom Bradley bucks will buy a decent cup of joe.

Of course, my own hometown is hardly without fault in this arena. Boston’s Logan Airport has some trouble with the alphabet.

The Alphabet, Everywhere but Boston:

A, B, C, D, E.

The Alphabet, in Boston:

A B, C, E.

BOS Airport Map
Don’t worry, we’ll be renaming “E” to “D” in negative 6 years or so.

I’ve always found the Jackson 5 song “ABC” rather disturbing, with an 11-year-old Michael Jackson singing about love. While the lyrics aren’t explicit, the song still seems to go too far. Now, I know the song actually didn’t go far enough, at least when it comes to teaching the kindergarten basics.

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