Counting the Sticks

Friday, June 26th, 2015

When he played baseball, Hall of Famer Wade Boggs infamously drank 50 beers on a cross-country flight. Or possibly 64. Or maybe it was 107.

But Cleveland manager Terry Francona may just have Boggs beat, with a sickening gluttony when it comes to grape-flavored Outshine fruit bars:

“I had 17 the other night. No, that’s not a lie. They’re healthy, so if one’s good, 17’s gotta be real good. I woke up in the middle of the night and I was like borderline, like it was coming up. But I was so tired that I just laid there for about an hour and I was like, ‘Don’t throw up, don’t throw up, don’t throw up.’ I I should have got up and threw up. And then I woke up in the morning and I was like, ‘****’. So I started counting the sticks.”

For reference, here are the nutritional facts for a single bar:

Nutrition Facts Image

If Francona’s count of 17 is correct, his binge pulled in 340% of his Vitamin C for the day, along with over 1,000 calories, and 272 grams of sugar. There are about 4 grams of sugar in a teaspoon, meaning these bars alone contained 68 teaspoons of sugar. The recommendation for an entire day’s worth of sugar consumption is just 7 teaspoons.

But hey, at least it was all fat-free!

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