Get Off My Back, CVS

Sometimes I receive an email that fills me with existential sorrow. An email with a subject like:

  • Paul, Are You Making the Most of Our App?

Well god, CVS, I guess I really just don’t know. Am I? The implication is clearly that I’m not making the most of your goddamned app. I don’t need this pressure though, man. Hell, you’re clearly aware that I have the app.

CVS Image

But that’s not enough for you, is it? You’ve gotta tell me about the features of an app I already have installed and insist that I use them. But I’m not in the habit of printing out many photos anymore, and I’m not on any pills. You just let me use my iPhone as I like, and I’ll continue buying the assorted cold medicine, greeting cards, and clandestine bars of candy that I usually do. Deal?