There’s big news in death recently. In California, the deceased or their heirs will soon be able to opt for “water cremation”, which is not quite what it sounds like. Apparently, the process decomposes the flesh with an alkaline solution.

All that’s left afterward are the clean, natural bones, which are crushed into ashes and returned to the family.

I can only assume they use a steamroller for this purpose.

Water cremation may sound grotesque, but it might actually be the safest bet for those who deal with corpses. Standard (burning) cremation is now the most popular option for dealing with the deceased, and that’s leading to an increase in the number of explosions at crematoria. The culprit? Pacemakers and other implanted medical devices, which act like miniature bombs when the body is cremated.

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