Astro the Grouch 

Monday, May 25th, 2020

It’s Memorial Day in America, a day to honor and mourn veterans who died wile serving in our armed forces. Paradoxically, it’s also the unofficial start to summer, and ordinarily a day of beaches, barbecues, and baseball. As a result of COVID-19, however, the 2020 Major League Baseball season has yet to start. Even so, baseball fans can still indulge their disgust for the cheating 2017 Houston Astros, thanks to a promotional item from Minnesota’s St. Paul Saints.

As the Saints’ staffers planned the 2020 promotional schedule, they plotted how to roast the newly sanctioned Astros. A trash can? Of course. Inside? Knockoffs of Oscar the Grouch and Orbit, the Astros’ mascot, carefully designed to skirt copyright violations.


Pressing the button will unleash a couple of bangs, or even a specific pitch.

With the season in doubt, the Saints have now decided to sell the item online, with a portion of the rather steep $35 price going to charity. Personally, I’ll be content to chuckle at the fact that this exists, write about it, and then move on.


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