Bragging about “acing” a cognitive test should be an immediate, retroactive failure, because it means you don’t comprehend what the test is actually measuring. But here we are.

Rather than indicating some high level of intelligence, a test like this simply shows a baseline level of brain function. The best result one can get is “Normal”. Boasting about your cognitive test is like saying you nailed your roadside sobriety test. It is not an accomplishment, it’s the bare minimum. In the case of an erratic driver, it means the police can’t point to alcohol as the reason for your poor operation of a motor vehicle. In the case of an erratic president, it just means you don’t have a medical excuse for your awfulness.

I’m skeptical that Trump actually even took the test, much less that he managed to not miss any questions. But if that much is true, I do believe the doctors would’ve been surprised, in a “Can you believe the problem isn’t dementia?” sort of way.