In 2022, I wrote about the Dyson Zone, a “wearable purifier” that was also a set of headphones. At the time, the odd fusion was merely announced, not released. The next year, though, the company began selling the product for the incredible price of $950 USD.

I’m more likely to pay $950 to not have to look like that.

Since its release, the price of the Zone has fallen steadily. Now, it seems to be completely dead. Wired got an exclusive interview with Jake Dyson, who holds the ignominious distinction of being the inventor of the Zone, as well as the only person photographed wearing it.

And perhaps most importantly of all, the whole Zone experience has led Jake Dyson to an extremely important realization—at least when it comes to headphones: “One of the things we’ve learned is obviously people really do bloody care about what it looks like when it’s on your head.”

In my earlier post, I said I would be not at all shocked to never see anyone wearing the Dyson Zone. Setting aside that promotional photograph of Jake Dyson himself, it now seems quite certain I never will.