If you live in America, you’ve likely seen some variant of this proud, somewhat jingoist, bumper sticker:

It’s both a statement of bravado, and a play on words, which is a rare combination. America’s flag (also known as our colors), and the people it represents, won’t run from a challenge or a fight. Setting aside the value of bumper-sticker patriotism, this seems an honorable, if perhaps brash, statement.

This real-world example, however, is comically in need of replacement:

[Photo credit: Mike Ash]

Believe it or not, though, it could have been even worse. It’ll be even more laughable if a similar fate strikes this sticker.

Epilogue

If you’d like to learn more about America’s flag, consult your local Wikipedia. In my own research, I learned three interesting new facts:

1. The last 35 states all share an anniversary day. All states admitted to the union since 1818 were brought in on the fourth of July.

2. While you probably know that the 13 stripes on our flag represent the 13 original colonies, you probably didn’t know that after the addition of Vermont and Kentucky in 1795, we had a 15-stripe flag. Presumably, adding 5 more states in 1818 made it clear how untenable the idea of adding stripes for each state would be.

3. Because the star arrangement didn’t become official until our 48-star flag in 1912, we had some Space Invaders-lookin’ messes in the 1800s. Check these out:

Space Invaders Flag #1

Space Invaders Flag #2

Wikipedia has democratized access to information, and that’s great. My love of Wikipedia, however, really comes from the areas where its ridiculousness shines through.

Obsession With Canon

In this portion of an article on the Saved By The Bell character Zack Morris, we can see Wikipedia’s collective obsession with canon for TV shows, movies, and more:

Mark-Paul Gosselaar appeared on the late night talk show in character as Zack in response to Fallon’s ongoing attempt to reunite the original cast. During the segment Zack explained that he and Kelly were divorced. The segment also implied he was still interested in Stacy Carosi. Whether or not this appearance is considered canon is unclear. [Link]

Wow.

Attention to Detail

This snippet from an article on astronaut Harrison Schmitt shows incredible attention to detail on both who the last man on the moon was and the difference between being a member of the armed forces and a civilian:

He is the last of the Apollo astronauts to arrive and set foot on the Moon (crewmate Eugene Cernan exited the Apollo Lunar Module first). However, as Schmitt re-entered the module first, Cernan became the last astronaut to walk on and depart the moon. Schmitt is also the first — and so far only — person to have walked on the Moon who was never a member of the United States Armed Forces (he is not the first civilian; Neil Armstrong left military service prior to his landing in 1969). [Link]

Now that’s nit-picky!

Random Laughs

I think my favorite thing of all about Wikipedia, however, is the random bits of amusing trivia I find. For instance, on the section of notable inhabitants of Contoocook, NH, we find this:

Rose Flanders Bascom, who was born in Contoocook in 1880, joined the circus and became a noted female lion tamer before dying of a lion mauling.

Or on the page for the M*A*S*H theme Suicide is Painless, there’s this:

Mike Altman is the son of the original film’s director, Robert Altman, and was 14 years old when he composed the song’s lyrics. During an appearance on The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson in the 1980s, Robert Altman said that his son earned more than a million dollars for co-writing the song while he only made $70,000 for directing the movie.

And let’s not forget the many hilarious images, like this one of the flag of the Benin Empire:

Who knew an encyclopedia could be good for a laugh?

Looking for More?

If you want to find more great bits from Wikipedia, you could blow hours on the Best of Wikipedia.