A Renegade Basketball League 

Monday, October 17th, 2011

The NBA’s opening day should be just a few weeks out. Instead, the players and owners are still fighting, and each day it seems less and less likely we’ll have a full basketball season this year, if we have one at all. Bill Simmons and Jay Caspian Kang talk out the details of their proposed renegade basketball league. Step one for getting their league (dubbed The Oracle) off the ground? Get Larry Ellison, he of the $33 billion dollars in net worth, on board:

Oh, and he also spent $200 million to win an effing yachting competition. He wouldn’t need too much more than that to start The Oracle, and if he somehow replaced the NBA with some weird proto-Communist version of professional basketball, it would be the greatest double-barreled middle finger to anything, ever.

Step two is having team names be a complete sell-out:

Instead of seeing Penny Marshall at Clipper games, you could see Mark Zuckerberg, Peter Thiel, and Meg Whitman whenever the San Jose Cisco Wireless Routers were in action.

This sounds far more exciting than the real NBA regular season. If only I had a few hundred million to spare, I’d bankroll the whole damned thing.

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