Who Pooped My Mailbox?

Back in November, I purchased a stuffed emoji pile of poo pillow.

November Pile of Poo Pic
Smiling Brown Triangle

How do I know it was November? Well, because said pillow was actually a work expense for my lady Maggie, at her completely professional and totally mature job. I used Square Cash (Square Cash!) to get paid back, complete with a dated explanation in an appropriately cartoony bubble.

Square Negotiations
Really rather expensive for a poop pillow

Anyhow, flash forward to yesterday, when a mysterious package arrived in my mailbox from So Unique Gifts.

February Pile of Poo Pic
It looks angry.

Now I appreciate the opportunity to earn some Instagram likes as much as the next guy, but thus far, I’ve gotten no answers. Multiple people have expressed that they wished they’d been the ones to send me this, but none have actually claimed responsibility. So, who did it? Reveal yourself, shitposter!

Update (February 22nd, 2016): Tune in to this mystery’s not-very-exciting conclusion!