Eating a Fake Tree Might Be Safer 

Personally, I’m a fan of a Christmas tree bonfire like the one Salem, Massachusetts lights annually on Dead Horse Beach. Yes, really.

It’s getting to be time to take down the holiday decorations. But hey, rather than throwing it away, have you considered eating your Christmas tree instead? Oh, you haven’t? That may be wise:

While animals have long devoured Christmas trees, more people have joined the feast in recent years. Still, Christmas trees sprayed with pesticides or other chemical compounds are dangerous to consume, and yew trees, which some people purchase during Christmas, are poisonous. Consumers should confirm their trees are edible before cooking them, cooks told The Post.

With whom, exactly, would I confirm? What number do I call to determine if my Christmas tree is edible?

Come to think of it, maybe the Butterball Turkey Talk-Line® can help. They seem like the closest thing to an expert in this arena. and they’re past the Thanksgiving rush by now.