The Human-Sized Dog Bed

In case a futon is a little too adult for you.

When I saw the headline “The Human Dog Bed We Love Is on Sale Right Now”, I couldn’t resist clicking. Apparently, Wired recommends the “Plufl Human Dog Bed”, which they’ve awarded a 9/10 rating. Normally $399, this ridiculous concept is down to a mere $275 right now. That’s a deal for “Sleep Awareness Week”, of which I was previously unaware. The week, that is. Not sleep. I’m pretty familiar with that, being a human person and all. I’m not sure we need a whole week dedicated to informing people about sleep.

Anyway, here is one of Plufl’s promotional images:

A human (and a dog) lying in a large human-sized dog bed
Can dogs go in the human-sized dog bed?

At three feet wide and over five feet long, the Plufl is certainly not small. Who has space for this massive thing in their house? At best, I could imagine it in a kid’s play area, like the furnished basement of a McMansion. It would still be goofy, but fine, kids like dumb things. Plufl has other ideas:

A human-sized dog bed in the middle of an otherwise normal living room

That is in the middle of the living room! Just imagine having people over. You’re sitting around, having a chat, and someone is just snoozing at your feet in this absurd human dog bed. Also, you have no place to put drinks or crudités, because the Plufl has replaced your coffee table.

At present, Plufl’s site says the product is “loved by 11,364+ households”. If I ever find myself in one of them, I will not be able to keep a straight face.