Eight years ago, I first noted the phrases printed on the wrappers of Halls cough drops. When I was recently mildly under the weather again, I purchased some more Halls, and found a somewhat updated list of encouragements.

This newer wrapper design is a step backwards in terms of legibility, but given what’s written on the wrappers, that may be a feature. Here’s a full list:

A Complete List Of Slogans Seen on Halls Cough Drops Purchased in 2026, along with dumb responses I thought of while seeking to avoid a coughing fit

• Seize the day.
  I’m sick! I’d really rather not.

• Go get it!
  Please calm down.

• Go for it.
  Thank you. Still, my ambition is not that high right now.

• Get through it.
  That’s much more reasonable.

• Conquer today.
  No, that’s too much again! How about “Survive today”?

• Don’t wait to get started.
  I think I will.

• Put your game face on.
  OK, but keep me on the bench today, huh?

• March Forward!
  Why is “Forward” capitalized?

• A PEP TALK IN EVERY DROP™
  It’s been at least eight years. Isn’t it time you registered this trademark? Stop yelling and go ® that ™.

• Turn “can do” into “can did!”
  Alright, I’ve ignored the seemingly random usage of periods and exclamation points until now. But this really ought to have a period at the end, or the exclamation point should move outside the (sickeningly straight) quote.

• Impress yourself today.
  I’ll be impressed if I don’t crack a rib.

• Tough is your middle name.
  Actually, it’s not.

• You’ve survived tougher.
  OK, that’s probably true.

• Nothing you can’t handle.
  As is that.

• Take charge and mean it.
  More like “Nap and mean it”.

Ultimately, I did indeed survive my mild cold and now I’m putting it to good use as content for this site.