Previous “VWTASTB” posts

Dropping in Unannounced 

A good time was had by all.

It’s a good week for things falling out of the sky here at OFT, as we’ve now got a new vehicle where it ain’t supposed to be. Last weekend, a becalmed hot air balloon had to make an emergency landing, and it wound up in Hunter and Jenna Perrin’s tiny backyard. You may have already seen footage of the landing, with everyone looking delighted:

A group in a hot air balloon basket, in someone’s very small backyard[Image via: Hunter Perrin]

I particularly appreciate the sheepish grin and shrug, but my favorite shot comes from later, when the balloon was being hopped out of the backyard:

A hot air balloon over a suburban house[Image via: Hunter Perrin]

You certainly don’t see that every day. And speaking of unusual events, the company in charge of this particular flight was Magical Adventure Balloon Rides, who have previously made headlines for a rather different reason. They offer “mile high flights”, and according to their site, “[i]t is exactly what you are thinking”. You and your partner can take an exclusive flight to 5,280 feet in “a basket equipped with a privacy curtain”, while the “discreet pilot will wear protective hearing gear and focus solely on flying the balloon”. A 2024 piece I found was quite a read, and included this:

“I don’t want to be indelicate, but OK, I’ll just be direct: They were [doing it] doggy-style, with the woman over the side of the basket…so she could look out.”

“Wouldja look at that view?!”

Vehicles Crushed by Snow 

“Entombed in dirty snow” is a bad way to go

As the weather warms up in New England, the massive snow piles found around Boston are finally melting. One particular pile has garnered quite a bit of attention due to what was revealed underneath it. Namely, cars. A half-dozen cars were covered by snow piles, and now they’re reemerging.

A car, buried under a huge mound of snow
[Photo credit: u/jj3904]

I’m a bit skeptical of the claim that all of these cars were “waiting to be junked” prior to being buried under tons of snow. Regardless, however, but they’re definitely junkers now.

Try Putting It in Some Rice 

It’s not quite being “there”, but it’s a start.

Louise Dickinson Rich once wrote “My attitude toward catastrophes is that I don’t really hope they’ll happen, but if they have to, I hope I’ll be there to see”. I share that perspective, and so I was glad I got to see this poor, water-logged front-end loader:

A nearly-submerged front-end loader

If you too enjoy a rueful chuckle at a vehicle where it ain’t supposed to be, you can find more shots of this mess over on Instagram.

A Visit to Staples Rock

It was everything I hoped it would be—a big, dumb rock in the parking lot of a Staples.

Barely a week after I first wrote about Staples Rock, I found myself taking an unexpected day trip to Cape Cod. This was so serendipitous I couldn’t possibly miss the chance to visit the Cape’s newest attraction. Also, it was completely on my way.

As I pulled into the strip mall where Staples Rock resides, I was shocked to find a complete lack of lines or crowds. Sure, it was morning in the middle of the week, but it’s not as if the area was devoid of people. I saw several folks going into and out of various businesses, but all appeared oblivious to the splendor mere steps away. I was sad for them, but delighted for myself. More rock for me.

When I walked up to this marvel of nature, I could hardly believe I was in its presence. There it was, Staples Rock, in the flesh. Or mineral, anyhow. Check out all its majesty:

Staples Rock, in all its splendor

A hero ought to have a great origin story, and Staples Rock’s begins with an epic journey. It appears to be a “glacial erratic”, which is a delightful term for a boulder that was picked up by a glacier and carried outside the area where it originally formed. After a slow journey of hundreds of miles, it was deposited in what would later become Orleans, Massachusetts, and eventually covered up completely. Much more recently, it was unearthed during some sewage work in the parking lot. Classic hero stuff.

After workers brought the massive stone above ground, it was decided that it would be kept there, right outside Staples. Why? Because last year, a car barreled through the front of the store:

A car that has driven halfway through the wall of the store.
That’s so VWTASTB!
[Photo credit: Cape Cod Times]

No people were hurt, but that brick wall sure took some damage. As a result, when this big-ass boulder was found, someone facetiously suggested that it could serve as protection for the store. Joke or not, now, it does.

The evidence of that vehicular incident actually remains quite visible on site, by comparing the building’s two peaked roof turrets. One of them features an intact brick wall, much like the wall you can see in the photo above, only less Kool-Aid Man’ed:

A turret with a wall that is made of brick

That’s not the wall that took the hit, however. The victim wall is no longer brick:

A turret with a wall that is no longer made of brick

Instead, the entire thing has been covered in classic Cape Cod cedar shingles. It’s certainly a choice. What they have not done is install any additional bollards, say right in front of the wall, which could prevent another drive-thru from being installed unexpectedly.

But then, even if the idea began as a joke, Staples Rock really is doing the job when it comes to protecting the store. I certainly didn’t see any cars drive through the wall in the seven minutes that I was there, anyhow.

I’ve been asked if I would describe this natural wonder as “breathtaking”. I don’t know about that, but I can tell you that it was eye-receiving. When I arrived, I was saddened to discover that Staples Rock had lost its googly eyes. That just wouldn’t do, so I made sure that it had a pair before I left:

The rock, looking gneiss, with two new googly eyes.

After all, if we’re going to gaze long into Staples Rock, Staples Rock should also be able to gaze into us.

The rock, gazing into the future.
A contemplative Staples Rock

Rise and See a Massive Ship Out Your Window 

Someone really ought to tell that captain he can’t pahk there.

When I first heard that my late father had once slept through an earthquake, I was incredulous. I pictured the sort of catastrophe you see in disaster movies or the 1989 World Series. Since then, however, I’ve lived through some minor earthquakes myself. They’re disconcerting, to be sure, but I can now understand how they might fail to wake someone from a deep sleep.

Failing to be woken up by a container ship coming within 26 feet of your Norwegian house, on the other hand, I just can’t fathom.

A massive ship, in a yard, 26 feet from a house

Johan Helberg, who lives in Byneset, on the Trondheim Fjord, was woken by his neighbor on Thursday morning asking if he had noticed a boat outside, TV2 Norway reported.

Listen, Jostein Jørgensen, please don’t ask Johan Helberg about any boats before he’s had his coffee.

Don’t miss the picture from photographer Jan Langhaug, which is simply fantastic:

Three people staring up at a massive ship in a yard
“Se, der ligger problemet ditt.☝️”

If I get one or two more of these posts, I’ll have to make a proper category for “Vehicles Where They Ain’t Supposed to Be” (VWTASTB).

Package Delayed Due To Tides 

A rising tide sinks some packages.

If you live on Cape Cod and recently found your package delivery delayed, there may be a very good reason.

A FedEx truck surrounded by, well, the ocean.[Photo credit: Wellfleet Fire Department]

On Saturday, a FedEx driver had to be rescued after his truck was partially submerged due to a rapidly rising tide.

The driver was traveling on Lieutenant Island Road when the tide began to rapidly rise and submerge the vehicle, the department said. Wellfleet Fire called on residents to be cautious during high tide on that road, which travels along Loagy Bay to Lieutenant Island in Wellfleet.

Oh yeah, that definitely ain’t right.

Previously in Vehicles Where They Ain’t Supposed To Be: The Hot New Show, “VWTASTB”

The Hot New Show, “VWTASTB”

Today, let’s enjoy a special double-stuffed edition of “Vehicles Where They Ain’t Supposed To Be”.

First up is Pegasus Airlines flight #8622 in Turkey, which attempted to take a dip in the Black Sea. It’s off-road adventure (officially known as a “runway excursion”) took it into the mud on the cliffs of Trabzon airport. Fortunately, that same mud prevented the aircraft from making it to the water, and no one was hurt. As such, this photo is funny, though it’s also horrifying.


Like a beached whale

Meanwhile, I can’t imagine alcohol wasn’t involved in this particular hot mess:


That’s some truly impressive height

Fortunately, much like the above, no one was seriously injured in this instance. But let’s take a moment of silence for those poor, poor dentistry files.