Once companies like Samsung started selling internet-enabled refrigerators with included screens, it was only a matter of time before they brought ads to your kitchen. Still, the fact that this was predictable does nothing to lessen the disgust I feel now that this garbage has arrived.
Previous “Our Terrible Future” posts
With Friends Like These ∞
Who the fuck needs COINTELPRO?
Monday, September 8th, 2025
A little over a year ago, I linked to a puff piece about the AI-powered Friend pendant. Now, writers Kylie Robison and Boone Ashworth have reviewed the device for Wired, and they are not fans.
It is an incredibly antisocial device to wear. People were never excited to see it around my neck. I certainly wouldn’t approach my neighbor with a mic and try to assuage their anxiety by telling them the audio is just going to a chatbot…I found out quickly that even at the most tech-minded gatherings, the thing was a complete taboo.
My initial reaction to this device, as well as others like it, was distinctly negative. I do not want to wear an always-recording device. I also do not want to hang out with someone else who’s wearing one. As I’ve read more about these devices, my distaste has only grown. A negative review such as this offers some hope that like Google Glass, these creepy little wiretaps will face enough backlash that they never take off.
I Like People to Look Like People
Sadly for me, that doesn’t seem to be in right now.
Friday, July 18th, 2025
When I wrote about garish weddings earlier this month, the linked page included an image that really caught my eye:
The woman on Jeff Bezos’s arm is apparently Lauren Sanchez, his wife. I poked around a bit more, and wound up on an article that included this comparison of Sanchez at age 33 (2002) and age 55 (2025):
Yes, how do these rumors get started?
Look, I make an effort not to comment on the appearance of other people. If someone stops looking like a person, however, an exception may be made. If that’s the result of plastic surgery for a billionaire’s wife, no one is safe.
This came up again when I read about a bizarre murder (and beheading!) in Australia. Tamika Chesser is charged with killing her boyfriend Julian Story. In something of a reverse “In The Pines”1, Story’s body was found in an apartment, but his head never was found.
Chesser’s head, meanwhile, looks like this:
[Photo credit: Tamika Chesser]
When I saw this picture, I wondered how police were going to arrest a mid-2000s video game character. Chesser has somehow fallen backwards from human into something out of the Uncanny Valley, and she looks like a virtual reality rendering.
That led me to ask ChatGPT to re-draw Chesser in the style of Fortnite. It came up with this:
Somehow, that AI creation looks more realistic than her actual photograph. Compare!
Anyway, seriously folks, aging is OK. So is looking your age! Looking like not a person, and paying for the privilege? No thanks.
Footnotes:
Perhaps more familiar as “Where Did You Sleep Last Night?”. ↩︎
New and Not Improved ∞
Oh, also, Grok even more recently added a porny chat companion.
Thursday, July 17th, 2025
Earlier this month, Elon Musk wrote about X Formerly Twitter’s integrated chatbot: “We have improved @Grok significantly, You should notice a difference when you ask Grok questions.” People did, in fact, notice a difference. Soon thereafter, Grok started spewing antisemitic content and eventually began to refer to itself as “MechaHitler”. That doesn’t seem like an improvement to me, but then, I’m not a neo-Nazi.
Anyway, sure, what could possibly go wrong with the U.S. Department of Defense giving a contract worth up to $200 million to xAI, to “develop agentic AI workflows across a variety of mission areas”?
Rental Car Damages Should Not Be a Profit Center ∞
Normal wear and tear is a thing.
Monday, July 14th, 2025
In a vacuum, an AI-powered scanner for rental car companies to check for damage could be OK. Performing identical scans both before a rental goes out and after it returns should make for easy and useful comparisons that remove subjectivity and human error.
The trouble appears to be that Hertz is looking to cut both humans and common sense entirely out of the process.
Something to Fear and Embrace ∞
I lean away from the latter, myself.
Thursday, July 3rd, 2025
Sam Apple took a couples retreat with 3 humans and their AI partners, and it was really something.
While AI chatbots may have benefits in certain cases, I can’t help but think that they’re likely a net negative for society. Forming real, authentic connections with others is part of what it means to be a person. Paying to have your phone provide a simulacrum of a real relationship feels depressingly unhuman.
An Extremely Low Quota ∞
If you can hit your annual quota on January 1st, it should probably be increased.
Monday, June 16th, 2025
In January of 2024, Steven Kramer orchestrated the sending of an AI-generated deepfake to voters in New Hampshire. Essentially, he had the voice of Joe Biden urge voters to skip the state’s primary and “save their vote for November”. His stated intent was to alert people to the dangers of AI, as he was “worried about the lack of regulations”.
While AI may be poorly regulated right now, many other laws do still exist, and some of them are even enforced. So it was that Kramer was brought up on charges of felony voter suppression as well as candidate impersonation, and was potentially facing up to 88 years in prison. Last week, he was acquitted, avoiding that jail time. Time will tell if anything comes regarding his broader point about the lack of AI regulation.
What I’m most stuck on, however, is this quote:
“This is going to be my one good deed this year,” [Kramer] recalled while testifying in Belknap County Superior Court.
I’ve heard of a good deed for the day, but your one good deed for the year? Let’s all set our sights a little higher.
The Last Stop Before the Ocean ∞
It’s like AI slop come to life.
Thursday, June 5th, 2025
Bin stores are new to me, and I find the concept deeply unsettling. This sure seems like a terrible indictment of capitalism.
Summer Can’t-Reads ∞
"The Last Algorithm” is a particularly amusing name here.
Thursday, May 29th, 2025
Recently, newspapers around the country printed a list of summer reading recommendations that mostly consisted of books which don’t exist. If you guessed this was the result of insufficiently reviewed AI output, you win! Unfortunately, you also lose, just like all the rest of us.
Come Ride the Inhumane Skies ∞
“Ultra-high density” is quite the euphemism.
Wednesday, May 21st, 2025
All I’ve ever wanted on a plane is a pod, but airlines aim to go the other way, relentlessly exploring terrible new ideas for cramming more people onto flights. Today, an awful concept from 2018 is again in the news, with rumors that it will appear on some budget airlines next year.
Look on Avionteriors’s work, the “Skyrider 2.0”, and despair:
It is absolutely no surprise at all to me that Ryanair, an airline which ill becomes the dignity of humankind, is excited by this awful idea.
