One Magical Front Door

Why, how do you spend your money when you can't travel or really go out at all?

Recently, I bought some potato chips. More specifically, I bought 156 single-serving bags of potato chips from England. Now sure, ordering over $100 worth of junk food might seem crazy. But what you have to remember is that it’s 2020, and we each need to find a way to get through this thing. Also, the British really know their way around a salt & vinegar “crisp”, as they call them.

So yes, this happened:

Only a fraction of the haul
[Photo courtesy of P. Kafasis]

As absurd as this recent purchase might seem, however, it’s far from the most ridiculous thing going on here. First, let’s talk shipping speed. My order was dispatched from England in the afternoon on Monday, September 14th. It was driven from Bristol to East Midlands airport about two hours away, then flown across the Atlantic to New York City. There, it cleared customs, and was quickly driven to Boston. Just over 48 hours after it began its journey, the box was at my front door. That’s simply unnecessary, particularly for such a frivolous purchase.

Better still is the note DHL added to the last item of the tracking information:

This was not in fact the approximate location where I signed for the package. Instead, the delivery was left without an actual signature or even a ring of the doorbell. Thankfully, I noticed it before any snack fiends could make off with my precious cargo. If I hadn’t, however, I think DHL would’ve had a hard time defending themselves given this note.